I’m Hamlet, a short haired guinea pig who lives his life on the edge. While my mom is out of the apartment I like to see what kind of mischief I can get into. The dog helps me obtain human objects that we find oh so fascinating! Thank you, dog, for making this guinea pig’s life fun and adventurous!
The orange peel: Us guinea pigs love to use the orange peel for many things. An orange peel can constitute as a butt freshener, rocking chair, hammock, or parachute! I like to start my mornings off with a quick chomp of the orange. I use the peel to parachute over to the dog to ask her about all of the happenings in the human household.
Spoons: Spoons are just not for eating that gruel you humans call food! The dog will toss a spoon into my cage, so I can launch fruits and veggies to her mouth. The dog loves food–and I love launching delicious supplements into her dog belly. I prop the spoon against the hay buffet, place the desired fruit or veggie onto the spoon, and then jump on it to initiate the launch sequence.
Hairbrush: Oh, hairbrushes are awesome! I use my mom’s hairbrush as a back scratcher for that mid afternoon scratch. Sometimes the dog will use it to groom her fur, but I find this odd. I thought dogs liked being unkempt and stinky?
The sink: The dog will never join me in doing laps in the sink. I’m assuming it’s because she’s large or because she hates baths. When I know that mom is going to be gone for a while, I fill up the bathtub and practice my backstroke. The dog stands by with her stopwatch to time my laps. Some days I like to fill up the sink and use my rubber duckie float and just relax.
Toilet paper rolls: Who needs Lincoln Logs when you have toilet paper rolls? The dog and I are currently in the process of building a fortress out of toilet paper rolls, complete with a moat. When mom is away, we go into the laundry room and spin the toilet paper off of the roll by using the dog’s tail. Paper flies everywhere! The dog thought it’d be a great idea to use peanut butter to hold together the rolls, but then kept licking the peanut butter off of the rolls. We’ve now resorted to using the vanilla frosting that was supposed to be for mom’s birthday cake.
The kitchen table: The kitchen table makes a great stage for singing and being a big star! A couple of days a week, the dog opens the door so my guinea pig friends can come over to sing and dance! We pretend that we are on Guinea Pig Idol and the dog is the judge. The dog is very hard to impress. I don’t think she can understand what we are saying with our wheeking.
Pillows: Mom refuses to buy me a trampoline, and so I use the pillows on the bed and couch to achieve my gymnastic goals. I have the dog move the pillows into a square shape and then I begin my flips and flops. The dog acts as a spotter to make sure that I don’t fly into the wall or bounce into the garbage disposal.
Television: When the humans are not home, the dog and I switch on the television. Sometimes we watch Netflix, sometimes cartoons. The dog loves to watch cooking shows, but I like to watch documentaries.
The freezer: One thing I’ve always wanted to do is climb Mt. Everest! The dog opens the freezer for me, picks me up and places me into the cold abyss. I forge the mountains of pizza boxes to get to the ultimate prize, the glaciers! According to the dog, glaciers are the ice cubes that mom puts in her iced tea.
Pens and pencils: My dreams of being an Olympic champion in pole vaulting are getting closer each day,! The dog knocks the pens and pencils off of the desk with her big tail, so that I can practice my pole vaulting. I get my running start from the bathroom that connects to a hallway, which leads right to the bedroom. The bedroom contains the bed that I use for a soft and nice dismount. Yesterday, I was able to make it to the other side of the bed. Sigh, some days I don’t get to the bed because the dog has her big butt in the way as a hurdle.
In closing, life as a guinea pig is great! I have a great dog companion that does a lot of things for me and a human that takes care of me. If you are considering getting a guinea pig for a pet, remember adopt, don’t shop! Wheek!
Written by Nikki Harbeston, Creative Stuff, for LAA Pet Talk. She resides in South Carolina with her husband and dog. Her blog features Diary of a Chubby Piggie and Into the Journey of Dog. Copyright August 2013-March 2014.
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